Here and Now
by ChangingTheStory
Summary: A story of how Wolverine and Rogue came to be in a world post DOFP. Logan's back from a war that never happened with a second chance at things he never knew he could have. Canon to my other stories, but no prior reading needed!
1. Chapter 1

**_Welcome and thank you for coming on over and see a new story I've started that fleshes out the other one shots about these two. I'll do my best to update frequently, which shouldn't be too hard as I already have the ending all marked out with a bow on top. Please read and review, let me know whatcha think!_**

 ** _Disclaimer: Not mine, just borrowing for a bit._**

 **Here and Now- Chapter 1**

This timeline is confusing, and I'm not adjusting easily to it. Time space continuum is messy, and way past any form of expertise or understanding that I ain't even gonna pretend I have. It's fucked up how it works, and I don't even know how it works. I think I like this world though, this new...well whatever this life is.

I've been back for four days. Chuck and I met on that first day for six hours talking about what I remember versus reality, *his* reality, and where that put me with others. Where that all put me with what I know about myself, about *history*, and everything else in between. Not a lot is different then what I remember, but fuck if everything isn't different.

Stryker, Liberty island, the X-men, Marie. That's all the same, but I've had to talk to people directly to fill in holes. Doesn't matter what world I live in, it always starts with Rogue and a shit seatbelt. That's good, that'll always be mine.

Jeannie is alive, fucking Scooter too. I can't get over it. I know I keep staring at them, at her, Red. I watched her die. I felt her heartbeat stop beating on the end of my claws. Watched the light leave her eyes. Yet, here she is, and there's One Eye, glaring at me like a boyscout as if he never stopped. As if he never left one day after Jeannie's stint with a water damn and never came back. They look happy. They've always looked happy.

I love Jeannie, but I made my decision long ago, In a timeline not here. Should the time come and I could see her again, I was just going to set this be. I love her, I do, but she has her happily ever after and I can't do all that again. I won't do that again, and should've never done it to begin with.

Red can't keep up with the Wolverine, and the Wolverine doesn't want to be controlled and molded into something it's not. The Wolverine can't keep up with the Phoenix, not without death, and hate, and destruction. I could've loved her, but hours after hours of thinking and guilt, God so much guilt. We never would've worked, never would've felt right. I'm glad this time line let's her have another go at her ending, it's supposed to be this way.

Apparently Phoenix made a quick cameo this go around, but Magneto worked with Chuck and the cure to get a handle on things before they really started. The Phoenix came and left in a relatively quiet manner they said. Wish we knew about whatever it is they did the first time.

I remember I, well the other me got back just a few days after from up north, just two days after it all went down apparently. I've been back full time at the mansion for two years though, with the occasional break like that one scattered through. Only two years since that damn lab and meeting with Stryker. It was lifetimes ago, but here, just two years. I- he- we? I was feeling confined, tight. Fuck, if that guy knew what alone really was, it wouldn't seem so appealing. We have a few different memories- like shadows that were long gone that aren't anymore-like Wade. Apparently he almost joined up with us but thank fucking God he didn't. I'll have to tell you how I feel about him being back later.

Everything else seems the same, but I'm not so sure I know where I fit here. Do I fit here? Hell, have I ever fit anywhere? She says I have, I do- the kid. She's a couple years older than I remember her being last time I saw her, but she's still _her_ ya know? She's still sweet, and soft and a spitfire ready to throw down at the drop of a hat. It's nice, warm, familiar. All voice like warm caramel and a tongue sharper that one of my claws. Still with the popsicle too, and they seem happy enough, but no surprise he's already making eyes at his future wife. Or maybe not future wife? Ugh, fuck. I'm not Cable, I don't know the answers.

She marked me the day I got back. She knew something was off. She kept giving me looks as I made my way to Chuck's office, instantly keyed into my panic. I could smell her pacing outside the office from time to time. Three hours into my session with Charles, we had her come in, try to help fill in those gaps I was talking about. Kid didn't even have the decency to sound surprised when we caught her up.

"Pah! Sugar, I just had my old teacher come back from the dead and be possessed by some super-being from who knows where. You ain't got shit on that." Charles was nice enough to hide his chuckle behind clearing his throat though. I tweak one eyebrow at her and again Charles as he returned to catching me up with politics.

No Sentinels to be found anywhere, though the cure will seemingly be handed out through clinics within the next few days. Mutant human relations while fragile, haven't hit combustible levels yet, and Chuck is confident on McCoy being able to keep things steady with the public.

I spent the past three days mulling around the mansion and helping here and there where I could. Help move tree trunks for Storm's Garden. Fix up a couple of the older students' cars, throw in the occasional tip while watching danger room sessions with the team. People are giving me odd looks, but whether it's me or the Professor has said something, people have the common sense to set me be.

The majority of my time has been spaced. My future is starting to fog, the things that I know happen are starting to get out of my grasp some, and the past that had happened here is starting to clear. Chuck says that this makes sense, that I should still remember the basics, the frame, but the brain can only take so much in remembering things that defy logic; Remembering things that haven't even happened yet or may not happen at all. It's a trip, leading me to moments like this where I stop what I'm doing and try to take time to zip up my past from there and my past from here.

"Hey Sugar, you're looking a little stuck there." I jump at the sound of her voice and hit my head on the raised hood of the Ford I'm working on.

"Fuck Rogue! Jesus!"

"I'm sorry, " She starts, accent thick with sarcasm "usually I'm not all that concerned on sneaking up on the feral mutant with super senses." I growl in response.

"'Nother one of those headaches again?"

"Hm, yeah. Just still trying to get things on one track" I say roughly, reaching for the Moulsen on the tool tray and taking a swig. I purr affectionately as she comes closer and starts to massage my neck.

"Let me know what you need raggedy man, and I'll see what I can fill in for you."

This. This is nice, whether here or there- this feels normal. She's like putting on a warm blanket that you've had forever. We don't have to try, to bullshit. We just *are* with no expectations or concerns about who or what we are.

"Hm, Thanks darlin'" another grunt of satisfaction "but hey, whaddya doing down here anyway? Have a hot date with the fish stick?" Her hands go still, and after looking at her, her eyes a bit smaller in a glare as she takes a step back.

"Heh, not likely anytime soon. I wanted to talk to you actually."

"Oh, uh, alright then." Another swig of beer. I just got over telling myself how easy this is, so why is she acting this way? Biting her lip, shifting the weight of her legs back and forth.

"Go on, I'm listening."

She takes a deep breathe before starting. "I'm just going to start at the punch and say I've gone and had the cure."

I swallow down hard as I absorb her words. I stare at her gloved hands. I mean, it's not that surprising, we've been down this road before- back then, over there. Shit though, now? No warning, just went out and did it? She and I have talked about it here over the past couple years, memories are still fuzzy around the edges, but I seem to remember long nights by the fire talking about the 'what-ifs' with our powers. WHat would our realities be if they weren't the case.

"When?"

"'Bout 2 hours ago now. I thought this through, and you know my reasons."

"And the popsicle?"

"Heh. Wasn't so receptive to the idea. It's okay, you of all people knew it was a long time coming." More than you know kid.

Here there were conversations of how relationships were also limited because of our powers, but really no matter where I am he wasn't man enough to stick through and makes things work with her. The Rogue in her needed a match, equal, a survivalist, and the popsicle needed cookie cutter, something to fill the need of normal he'd never have as a genetic anomaly.

I calculate, but don't have it in me to tell her the potential of it fading, and I'm not even sure if I'm honest that that is even the case here. She knows all these risks too. Maybe it does fade. Maybe it takes months, or even years this go around. Fuck, maybe it doesn't fade at all. Fuck.

"You're still you, ya know that right?"

"Am I? I gotta figure that bit out."

I say it again.

" I hear that, but you're still you Marie. " I cross my arms and lean against the truck, squaring up straight with her. "What's the plan? What the Professor say?"

She smiles softly, her eyes glazing over as she thinks of something.

" I'm not sure, but the plan's not here. It's awfully quiet in my head right now and I want to figure out what that's like too. Anyway, both him and Scott were understanding about it. Everyone's in transition anyway with Jean back and you being home. I'm on sabbatical from the team for now, and from para-ing for now. They said I still have a place to call home whenever I want to. It was nice. Jean hugged me, Storm was a bit taken aback though, but you know how she is about our gifts."

I hum lowly in understanding. "Just about told everyone, huh?" Of course Storm would be the one who had a tougher time, the weather witch believes to her core that we are exactly what we're meant to be and that there should be beauty, not shame in that. She's caring and a friend first, so no matter the moral dilemma, of course it ended with a hug and congratulations.

Rogue and Cyke have a weirdly close relationship here as well. I'm still trying to peg down when or why that bond was formed but, they get on real well. I don't like it, but who am I to blame someone for gravitating to someone like Marie?

"Yup, just about. NightCrawler and Jubilee seem happy for me. Angel had some choice words. It just left you, but I wasn't worried about you Sugar."

Another understanding hum. I stare at her gloves more, swallowing again. I can't help it.

"What's it like? Have you tried it yet?"

She looks down at her shuffling feet.

"Just with the nurse who gave the shot. It was so anticlimactic. Here I am, haven't touched another soul for close to seven years, since 16- and she just pats my hand and walks away. Elle n'avait pas la moindre idée."

'She had no idea' she said, in her southern French, something she slips into at times, when feeling emotional and raw. We speak from time to time in French, something she's always found humor and comfort in as it reminds her of home she says.

"Montre moi."

Her eyes dart up, surprised and wide. She shifts again, thinking it through. Her eyes darting between the ground and me as she clings at her gloves.

"Êtes-vous sûr?"

"Of course I'm sure Darlin'."

She nods just slightly as she starts to remove her glove, her breathing just a hint heavier. One finger at a time until the glove slips off with a pull of her hand. She holds up her hand, strong and confident, her eyes looking square into mine.

And just like that, we're palm to palm, my larger hands, fingertips ending above hers. No pull, no pain. We stay there another few seconds, both just staring at our joined hands. I smirk as I weave my fingers between hers, holding her hand. She laughs a little and smirks, looking up at me and grazes her thumb back and forth over my hand.

"Huh, would you look at that?" She breathes out.

She gives a little yelp as I pull her hand so I can hug her. Cheek to cheek. I smile against her hand as she grazes the stubble on my cheek. She's still her, still Marie.

I hope she finds whatever it is she needs. I hope she connects to people, I hope she's able to breathe for the first time in a long time when in a crowded room. She deserves to start living. I hope she does come home. I hope she doesn't have to unless she wants to. We hold each other for who knows how long, I don't think either of us cared.

"Give me a call, okay?"


	2. Chapter 2

**What? Chapter two up already? I'm telling ya folx, this all is just floating around in my head, already preplanned! As always, please leave reviews. I'm sure revisions will be made at some point but let me know how you're feeling with all this. Past that, enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: Not mine**

 **Here and Now- Chapter 2**

 _ **Three Days Post Cure**_

I've officially been back a week, and I seemingly have reality back to reality now. Charles has agreed to give me another week, and then I can resume my 'prior teaching and team duties'. I didn't like that at first, it had me on edge but now that I remember things, I at least know I can do it.

I surprise myself with knowing the students around here, knowing their intricacies and their stories. I surprise myself with caring. This place doesn't feel so foreign anymore. It feels more like what we, well _they_ always wanted. Pieces clicking into place as if they belonged here right from the start.

She called this morning, right as I was in the kitchen grabbing my breakfast, let me know she was down in North Carolina.

"Why the hell are you down there?"

"I'm doing well Logan, thanks for asking." I could hear the smirk in her voice, see the glimmer in her eye in my mind. "I don't know, I showed up at the airport, it was affordable, and semi close to home. Sides, they upgraded me to first class since someone was a no show."

"Well ya can't compete with first class I suppose-Hey kid! Don't be taking all the bacon." I scowled as the youngin' scampered off- Mindy or Phoebe or something, one of the five of the sisters. Either way, leave my food be.

"Oh hell Logan, stop stomping around and let the poor kid be."

"Oh don't start darlin', you ain't even here to see this circus." After gripping the cell between my shoulder and ear, I grab two pancakes and add it to the pile of eggs.

" Have any fun yet?"

I'm met with a silence I was not expecting.

"Marie?"

"Yeah, I'm here. Sorry, yeah, uh, I've found myself a bit of fun." The way she says it, the way her accent drawls, I can hear that smirk growing to a smile.

"Does fun have a name yet and is he around for breakfast?"

"Logan!"

"Huh." I cant help but smile, turning to the large table behind me. " So that's a yes then. Good for you kid." Pulling out my chair and putting my plate down. I start shoveling down food. "You deserve it- Hey! I said leave some for the rest of us! And don't start on me Darlin', she's back at the counter grabbing at all the food quicker than Storm can make it." I'm annoyed, too many kids and people and it's too early. I should've taken it to my room.

"Quit your barking already, it was probably a different one anyway! I'm gonna go, I'll be sure to ring ya soon."

"Alright Darlin'- be safe, but more importantly make sure he buys you dinner first."

"Goddamn Logan, I-"

I hang up with a smirk before I get yelled at for something she finds just as fun. After all, usually the tables are turned and I'm the one taking a ribbin'.

I've been back for two years here at the mansion, but have known her for four, almost five now. In the past five years I've seen and heard her hit legal age, hit college, literally hit a few people on missions, and now hit the ground running. She's a friend I never thought I could have, or one I deserve as through the years I've helped show her the differences in hard alcohol and a well rolled cigar. She seems to be one of the few who is able to figure out what she's approaching when she comes to talk or sit with me. She's fierce in a fight and heaven help anyone who stands in her way when she's feeling stubborn. Maybe that's it. Maybe her Rogue and my Wolverine have an understanding.

I, well I who had a past here, thought it would be hard at first ya know? I thought that teenage crush was something she wouldn't get over and she'd spend an absurd amount of time pining after me. Then she went on a couple dates here and there and finally went steady with the ice prick. "Course I love you, you brute " she said, shortly after joining college and coming home from a night with Jubilee. "but I'm realistic and have far too much fun to have than your stuffy self could ever keep up with." Then that was that.

We'd meet up with each other often and she would tell me about classes or ask questions about love, men, life. She would listen to my cage conquests or musings about a lifetime I've already lived a long time ago. She'd be sure to poke when knowing I didn't come home one night, or if I was particularly more pissed off then usual. Uncomplicated and comfort. She was a blanket for my soul.

I lucked out this go around, with her and here and them. Lord knows there's shit down the pike, there always is...always, but for now I'll take my peace. The small smile I have quickly turns to a glare as I look in the corner of the kitchen next to Storm at the stovetop.

" For fucks sake Yellow, would you leave some coffee for the rest of us?"

 _ **Four Days Post Cure**_

I get a call the very next night, this time though, I'm able to put my feet up on the Danger room console and lean back in my chair. The dark making her voice that much more clear in my ear for me.

"Hey there Darlin', couldn't resist calling huh?"

"Hm, just couldn't sleep and figured you'd at least be up, whatcha up too?"

"Hm, just setting up some drills for the team tomorrow, might throw in some things that don't exist yet." I trail off as I remember how things could've gone, could go.

"And by the sounds of it, hopefully never will thanks to you sugar." She says confidently, reassuring.

"Hm, hopefully. Doubtful, but hopeful." With a sigh I rub my face and cross my feet at the ankles. Digging around in my pocket I grab a cigar with a matchbook and make quick work of lighting it. AFter taking a couple drags to make sure it's caught I focus in on her "Why can't you sleep? What've you been up to?"

She starts with a sigh before quietly speaking, frustration evident. "It's just so quiet, just _everywhere_ you know? I'm used to having 70 people in a building with me. I'm used to having who knows how many in my head that I have to keep at bay all the time. It's just, quiet. Even without my powers, I'm still just 16 shades of fucked up." She finishes off lazily, as if still contemplating what that might mean.

"Hm, a lot to adjust to I imagine kid, must be nice, must be lonely. You able to figure any of this out, have any fun? Use that touch of yours?"

"Heh, well yes, I got to go swimming today- like real swimming on a real beach in a swimsuit that I didn't need to cover up. Went with a guy I met a couple nights ago, yes, that guy before you ask. His name's Robert, he's a gentleman."

"Wouldn't expect anything less Darlin'. Able to start figuring out the scope of touch?" I say with a small smile "Figure out that you can have affection?"

"Hm yeah- it's weird, but welcome. I forgot how much connection comes with touching, how much different kind of connection comes with touching. It's been nice, real nice, but I'm new to this so we've decided to go our separate ways." Normally I would be all over this, teasing Marie about her one night stand , but who am I of all people raging on her for a physical connection she's been denied for so long? Who am I to say anything about letting the Rogue in her need to roam and play and unleash. I know this feeling.

"Hm yeah, I hear that. Was he nice darlin'? Good to you? Were things okay?"

"He was the best, and understanding. No strings attached. I didn't even know that was really a thing."

I snort a bit "Trust me darlin' he hit gold with you wanting that and he knows it. I'm glad you're able to get what you deserve though Marie, what you need."

"Hmmm thank you Sugar. Listen, I'm going to attempt some sleep soon. Tomorrow I think I'm heading out of North Carolina and might make my way a smidge more south, but I'll be sure to call soon, okay? Don't you be going acting a terror around there, ya here?"

" We'll see darlin', you know how I am."

"Exactly my point. Love you there Logan- be good."

"Hm you too kid." I drone off before hanging up. Good, this is good right? She sounded happy, sounded safe. This is good I decide, before picking back up programming well into the early morning.

 _ **Nine days Post cure**_

" How's she doing?" Jeannie asks while we finish changing into our civilian clothes post danger room session.

"Last I heard from her was late last week, she seemed good, happy." I focus on slipping on my sweatpants quickly and closing the locker

"Huh. She talked to Scott and myself briefly two mornings ago." I lift my eyebrows in questioning. "Me just long enough to say we missed her, but I guess she told Scott she was down in New Orleans now, oh! and to not get into it with you. I think there was a guy in the background but couldn't really tell." She eyes me with questioning and a small smile, wondering my reaction, wondering if I know anything.

I smile a bit, my suspicions confirmed that that girl couldn't sit still right now if her life depended on it.

"Well, she's got a lot of years to make up for, so might as well get as much wandering done as quickly as possible. Hey listen Red, I know it's my night to cover the mansion, but I really could use some time for myself too. Anyway...?" I lead off.

"Yeah yeah, go do whatever primal man stuff you need to do- Scott and I were just gonna order in anyway- but you owe me Logan."

"Absolutely do Darlin', I'll be sure to remember this." With a kiss to her cheek, I make my way to the garage and my (after having Scooter charge me way too god damn much in restitution) bike and make my way to a cage circuit I know locally. Find myself a bar, a fight, and a good woman to spend the next few hours with.

Her call comes right at the most inconvenient time. Three rounds of fights later, 5 shots of bourbon and a glass of whiskey gone and right as I'm hitting the door with a blonde that looks all too ready to spend some quality time with me. I hit ignore and continue to kiss my barfly longingly, starting to slip off my leather coat and begin to shuffle off my boots. The ringtone of her comes through again, but only just as I land on the bed with Jennifer, Jessica? Was her name Jessica? I'm raring to go to let the Wolverine side play, my jeans getting tighter as we kiss. I hit ignore again, the animal rising to the surface and ready, me already feeling heady from the past few hours of pure physical release. Just a fuck away from quieting down a deeper urge. The phone rings again.

With a loud groan I pull away. The vixen eyeing me with a question, already showing protest and confusion in her eyes. "Just, just give me a moment Darlin', just one moment- it's a friend. I'll be right back, don't go anywhere." I can feel the beast on the edges, feel myself all the more agitated by the prospect of letting myself go, at being so close to needs I have that haven't been met recently.

Stepping outside I angerly answer the phone.

"Fuck kid, this better be good." I'm met with silence instead, and just when I go to check my signal her voice comes through.

"Shit Logan, shit I'm sorry. " her voice comes out flighty on the other end "I didn't mean to interrupt nothing. I can go."

"Hey, hey, hey, hey. Kid, what's going on?"

"It's nothing, it's nothing-honest. I'll let you get back to whatever it is you're supposed to be enjoying."

" Marie, Hey, she can wait. Talk to me- what the hell is going on?"

She sighs again, I can here the hinge in her voice. "It's nothing. I just thought, I just thought I might of heard something? I think I'm just having a tough time, like I'm on sensory overload."

"Heard something?" My ears perk "Whaddya mean heard something? Like in the room with you? Someone after you?" While I get her being nervous, Marie is no damsel and I'd be far more concerned for the other person that comes in contact with her, powers or not. I trained her myself, and what she didn't get from me, she got from her own experience on top of whatever knowledge came from the people she took in. This isn't any average run of the mill call.

"Nothin', it was nothing. I think I'm just cracking a bit, doing too much too quick. I need to slow down maybe." Again, she sounds firm, calm, but there's something there, something just under the surface. It makes sense though. Having quiet after everything being so loud for so long. I'm sure it's sent her senses on overdrive.

"You sure Marie?"

" Yeah, yeah. I'm good. I'm good. Just needed to hear a familiar voice, something to ground me. Seriously, I'm okay, go get back to your night. I'll call soon, Kay?"

I swallow a low grumble, not so convinced, though knowing the kid can take care of herself. "Ya sure now?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm sure-talk soon."

"Alright Darlin' talk soon." I hang up with a nagging feeling in the back of my head, but promptly push it down to get back into my room. I went home that night, the beast somewhat satiated but with both of us feeling uneasy, still edgy despite being able to feed our primitive side some. I took the long way home that night.

 _ **11 Days Post Cure**_

Still no word from Rogue minus a quick text saying 'Everything was just fine and not to worry.' Not completely suspicious for her, but that last call left me uneasy, unsettled. Even talked to yellow and asked if she knew anything. "Rougey is doing just fine Wolverine, she'll be back before you know it." She said with sympathy before popping her gum obnoxiously.

I let myself be busy with starting to train kids in defense, and help work on things around the mansion. A giant hole in the wall there, someone broke a pipe in the basement here, nothing glamorous but quiet work I can cuss at while getting my hands dirty. This isn't my forever, but I'll take it for the time being, until I can figure out my next move. Until they got into something bigger than them. But this is my home now, my time, I remember what has happened here. Things are established, I'm content to sit for a bit longer.

The memories of before were fading even more, but I remembered, would always remember that feeling of having so few left, of the world being nothing but chaos. It was always there. For now I'll take the leaky pipes.

 _ **Thirteen Days Post Cure**_

It's 1:30 in the afternoon when her ringtone brings me out from under the radiator in Piotr's room. The guy tried fixing it himself but made it an even bigger mess then what he started with. Wiping off my hands, I pick up already annoyed from the half hour I spent dealing with the mangled piece of metal..

"Hey Kid, way to leave me hanging after that last call we had."

"Uh, hey- hey there, is this Logan?" It's her voice, but the accent is gone, the inflection all different. I'm not even sure the angle of this one.

"Kid? What are you playing at here?"

"It is Logan right? She says it's you."

Instantly my heart starts pounding. The cure. Last time it was months, *months* before small remnants of anyone's powers started showing back up. It's been, what? Not even two weeks. I didn't even think about how it would come back for her, I always just assumed it would turn back on quick, like a lightswitch. Her head, somethings going on in her head.

"Yeah, yes it's me."

"My name is Lilah, I uh met Rogue earlier today? At the cafe. Something happened, something bad. She's tried explaining but there's a lot going on over here, over with her. It's hard to hear much. Listen, I'm making my way at the airport, I'm gonna try and get her to you, hopefully in the next few hours and -" I start to panic as I'm met with silence.

"Logan! Logan! I'm okay, but things are a mess, and I'm fighting off a lot of noise in here and keeping the bad away as best I can and please tell the Professor I-" My heart drops as I hear her accent, her voice back and rushed and dripping with desperation. She's scared.

"Fuck Marie! Marie! Hey- kid, come back, we'll getcha, we'll come and pick you up!"

"It's okay, it's okay Mister, it's Lilah again." The foreign voice returning, just as desperate sounding, "I'm just about ready to walk on a flight heading right for you guys. She's doing the best she can and I think I can manage making it through security and onto the plane. Can you, can you just meet us there, when we get there? Bring any help you got?"

"Yeah, yes Lilah, yes. Where and when are you coming in?"

"JFK at 5:30."

"We'll be there. Tell her I'll be there."

The phone clicks off. How the hell did I not see this coming? How can I even begin to help sort through this with her. Leaving things as they are, I head towards Chuck, sending out a mental call. We need to get ready.


	3. Chapter 3

_**This was a bit harder of a chapter to write. For some reason, I can't even tell you why, I've decided to write this story in Logan's POV. I am planning on carrying that through, it's a pain in the ass but I like continuity. Also then I've been battling with what kind of Logan this is. The comic Wolverine is more gruff, more crude- but that's not what I'm going for here. I like Hugh's Logan, he's still strong and calculated, but he definitely is softer. I don't know maybe this is a weird mixing?**_

 _ **Likewise I'm trying to add something to Rogue that ya'll haven't read over and over, this one was a stumper.**_

 _ **Either way, Chapter Three! As always please read and review, let me know whatcha think.**_

 _ **Disclaimer: Wolverine, Rogue, the X men and all of those under the umbrella belong to Marvel and the late great Stan Lee, a man who could recognize that difference in people should be celebrated.**_

 _ **Chapter Three**_

I've been scanning the flights from Louisiana on the board over and over again. I hate airports, there's too much noise, too many smells, and it's that much worse thanks to the late May rain outside. I'm anxious and edgy, I'm trying to focus in while paying attention to those around me. Fuck, I'm gonna miss her, I can't concentrate.

Five potential flights coming in at that time from MSY, and JFK is just too fucking huge. It's a gambling game with me waiting on one end of the airport, the Professor at another, and Scooter at the last exit terminal. It's the only calvary I could round up in such short notice Red was left to oversee things at the mansion. Either way, we were out the door and driving within forty minutes.

No uniforms needed as to not bring any attention to us, just precautionary gloves in case. We don't know what it is we're even getting into and the last thing we need is a story breaking out about a philanthropist's mutant team causing a scene at the airport. The hour trip to grab her was justified by Chuck saying he could take the time to help her sort through things in the back of the SUV.

"She's not on the 5:20 Delta" I hear Scott in my ear. "Just waiting on the 5:35 and then I'll double back to Charles".

" Not on the 5:15 either" The Professor echos on comm, I'm sure for my benefit as I still can't get used to him inside my head.

"Yeah well, one of mine is just landing now, so here's hoping."

There's just a constant wave of people. Looking around from my spot against a window I try to take a couple deep breathes to ground myself, listen to my breathing, my heart. Focus on her, Marie. I open up my nostrils and try to break out scents from each other. Try to key into voices and conversations. I eye back and forth scanning across a line as people walk by me. I double back at a smaller framed brunette, not her. I listen for the twang and smoothness of her voice- not there. Two minutes, Three minutes, Ten minutes.

"She ain't on this one." My voice comes out gruff. The people are getting to me, the nagging worry building in the back of my brain while the need to get to her builds in my gut. The animal wants to take over. Where is she? Fuck why didn't I do anything when she called me that night? I knew, I _knew_ something was off, but I was too worried to get a fuck in to actually take in all the red flags.

I feel responsible, not for my ward, but for my friend. For the kid turned woman I watched grow up on and off, helped train to be part of this asinine team we're part of. For the person who knew me before I knew myself. Who talked to me while I was just a nomad who couldn't be bothered to give a shit or have any modicum of manners to give to anyone. It didn't matter what time line and when, she was always the start to it all. The armor always chipped when asked in such a sarcastic, grim way that only Marie could pull off to still be sweet.

"What kind of name is Wolverine anyway?"

I've already lived a lifetime without her at the other place. She fell from the Sentinels when she went off with the Cajun to try and save the outpost in Europe with him and Mystique. I talked to her just a few days prior, but then received the news post battle over in DC. There was just so many deaths, and trying to process all of them and what they meant- what she meant. It was too hard, and now starting to be harder as I grasp at memories that don't want to be remembered.

I can't help but feel like a piece of me went with her back then, any hope of being anything past Wolverine even if they did win was long gone with her and the remaining X-men who I called friends. Then saw her here though, remembered things and memories that didn't happen before, and that the deep connection was still made with her, just like before- at least what I could remember of before. I forgot how nice it was to have a companion, someone to skip all the performative bullshit with.

Now though, I can't stop panicking that it's happening all over again. She'll be gone and this time it wouldn't be with the others, from war. I can feel what it would be like this time, when I fought so hard to get this all back. I can feel it in my obsessive hyper-focusing and tight chest. In the weight that is starting to take over as I'm attempting to talk myself through being present so I can be useful when she needs me.

"I dunno guys, what if she didn't make the plane. I mean that Lilah girl was so uncomfortable and not even really sure she could get through security over the-"

"I got visual!" Scott's clear and not so stoic voice comes through "Other side, baggage claim 8."

I exhale. She made it, she made it.

"Be there momentarily- trail but don't make contact Scott. Logan, meet us here as quickly as possible."

"Yeah wheels, be there in a minute. How's she look?" I'm rushing through the crowd, it's slow moving as I weave in and out of people, brushing by with my shoulders or a quick 'Move.' I'm sure I leave a path of angry or cursing people behind me.

"She's okay. Flighty...edgy. We're heading towards the main floor. Hm, hang on, she sees me." Still moving, I try to pick up my pace.

"She's walking away?" He sounds confused

" Two minutes out." I take the corner, calculating where she's going and how I might be able to cut her off. Fuck this airport is huge. I cut into a jog as I now have a clear, large passage to make my way towards the baggage claim area before it gets congested again.

"Stay with her. " the Professor now in my head instructs "I'm right above you Scott, I see you."

"Damn it, she's running!"

"Charles stop her! I'm right around the corner from you Scott, hang on."

"I cannot- I tried already. Her brain is too disjointed for me to get a good lock on from this distance." I feel myself pause for a second, confused. What distance? For him to say he can't...

I turn the corner and stop as I take in the new wave of passerby's. Scanning the crowd I see Scooter all the way down the section, trying to push through a crowd of sightseers who are loudly and slowly inking forward. I eye the three TSA agents- one on the right side by the security screen exit and the other two, sitting outside a newsstand storefront drinking their coffees.

Then I see her, Marie. Her hair is piled up in a bun on her head, a sheen of sweat covering her forehead, a duffel over her shoulder as she heads straight towards me while looking back at Scott. I feel myself start to mentally prep myself, to brace myself for whatever the fuck is going to happen. My breathe quickens as I make my way to cut her off.

I rush to stand in front of her and allow her to knock into me. She makes a small noise of surprise while taking a few steps back, then snaps her head back to look at me. Her eyes glaze over and then shift back towards me. We're face to face now, and looking into her eyes, I know that's not her. She's doe eyed, her expression surprised and alarmed. Her scent giving over waves of anxiety. She's raw and open, everything happening with her clearly displayed across her face. I put my palms up and back up a step, talking to her as I would a skittish animal.

"Easy now, darlin'. Easy. Do you know who I am? Rogue? Lilah?"

Her eyes meet mine as I see recognition flicker across and her expression relax just slightly. She shifts feet and gives another scan around as people start walking around us.

"You're Logan then? I remember your face at least, she does that is." I tilt my head slightly at hearing her crystal clear no accented voice, her speech higher than how she usually talks.

"I'm Logan, and that guy you're running from is another friend of ours, Scott. The Professor is here to. Do you know who those people are?" I watch as her eyes wander away for a second.

"Yes. Listen we got to get out of here. That wasn't me a second ago. I'm losing her and there's a lot of things going on and people in here and I'm not sure how long I can keep it together." The panic clear across her eyes and face, I can see how flighty she is. It's my Marie with none of the mannerisms, with none of the her.

"What do you mean you're losing her? Get her back. Marie," I lower my voice and lock eyes with the imposter "Get your ass back here, come on kid.'

She tilts her head back again, almost as if she had a twitch. "She can't hear you Logan. I think, I think she can barely hear me."

I make eye contact with Scott as he catches up, eyeing Rogue up and down and assessing her well being as I nod at him before grabbing her elbow and guiding her towards the exit. I get the nudge of telepathy as the Professor probes and mentions he'll be with us 'in just a short moment'.

" She came to my cafe yesterday. Poor thing looked like a scared kitten, she was so shook up. I was serving her." Rogue stumbles as she begins talking a mile a minute in hushed tones. She's clunky, and getting her through the crowd takes longer as I half pull her. She struggles to keep up but is moved along by Scott right behind her.

"After refilling her mug I just patted her hand, I didn't mean anything by it. I don't remember what happened after. I just know a few hours later that this is me, that she's me. I woke up in a hotel I didn't know and then I hear her talking to me, but she's not there. She's in here." She taps her head as we go out the doors. "...but then I hear so many other people too. She got me to call you. She dialed your number."

I listen and continue to guide her as we get in the elevator to the parking garage. "This one's full." I bark at a couple trying to get in with us.

"And there's just so many people in here and I don't know, she's been trying to keep it under control but it's bad Logan- whatever the hell she has in here with her and she's done everything she can to keep things back while I was on the plane and then..."

She groans loudly and holds her head, falling back against the door.

"Lilah? Rogue?" I say as I help hold up her weight, Scott coming on the other side to help as well.

"Rogue. Hey Rogue, are you alright?"

She moans some in response to him, still holding her head. I look down at her as I feel her shoulders quickly stiffen and her posture change. Making eye contact with Scott, I give him a knowing look and tense up myself.

"Lilah?" I say, shaking Rogue at the shoulder.

"Not here." Her accent now foreign, alien with an Australian tinge. She raises her head and gives a glance at me before eyeing Scott. "Frankly though, it took quite a bit to get here and I have my own things to do. I feel for the Sheila , but time for me to go."

She swipes at Scott before taking a low kick to my knee, pushing me into the elevator buttons. The elevator hurls to a stop as the emergency alarm rings loudly. Scott blocks but then takes a fist to the side.

Whoever has her is used to having a broader stance, a bigger body I observe. Scott steps back and hesitates just for a second before hitting her in her stomach as I turn off the elevator's stop. The box grunts and starts moving as I make sure my gloves are on tight before half tackling/ half grabbing her from behind. She grunts while bracing her hands on my arm. In a move not like hers, she's kicking off Scott to ram me into the back wall. We both grunt, but I stay holding tight.

"Marie. Marie knock it off" I gasp out as she tries to head butt me. "Come on Darlin', time to get control and get back here." I groan as another head butt lands against the side of my cheek. She goes slack against me, just for a second.

Then I feel it. The quiet thrum that I can feel in my bones. The strain I feel as I fight a weight pushing against me. The elevator jerking to a stop. I try to keep my arms tight around her chest from my place behind her, but my grip is loosening.

"Scott- Losing her" I strain out while he looks around and attempts to start up the elevator with a few push of the buttons with no luck. I watch as she pushes against my arms, and attempts to grab at my exposed arm with her bare hands. I'm slow, but able to kick her calf so she stumbles forward. The surprise gives me time to tighten my grasp.

"You dog." I look down at the top of her head. I'd recognize that tone anywhere, that nickname. I don't know how she's doing this, how she still has the ability to do this. Scott stops cold and stares at her, knowing the truth but unable to process the reality of it. After just another second and yet another look to me, he sweeps her legs. The elevator jerks to starting again. She and I both fall forward, her to her knees, me just catching myself at the last second to broaden my stance and lean down on her before falling.

"Do whatever you want, you foolish children." Her voice deeper, more authoritarian. " But she has stolen so much from quite a few people. Memories, powers, even full lives. They're angry and want out. This power cannot be caged, she will be used as she should be to help the mutant agenda."

"Magneto." Scott sounds cold, angry. "Give her back,"

"Try all you want fools. She is lost to you." My blood runs icy, my breathe hitches and I feel a drop in my stomach. I debate for a second but only can think to react with anger.

"Try all you want Erik." I pull her up roughly to standing, shaking her "but when this is over, this woman will have you caged up so deep you'll be wishing you were the real you."

The doors open, and the Professor is right there to greet us. Within seconds, I feel her tense, ready to fight. Scott squaring up for whatever's next. The Professor leans forward as he directs his chair in between the doors as I push her forward.

"Charles- if you think that I wi-" but before she can finish, the Professor has his gloved hand on her face.

"Sleep now child." and just like that she slumps forward. I'm only just able to catch her before hitting floor.


	4. Chapter 4

I know, I know- I'm sorry I've been M.I.A. for a bit, but life has been crazy with kids and life and what not l AND I hit a bit of a block.

But let's not focus on that- let's focus on this awesome (hopefully) new chapter! There's a lot of time passing and waiting in this chapter as I didn't want to show Rogue's side as it's starting to formulate into a really cool fic idea in my head. I'm undecided if I like that this is where the Chapter went pacing wise, but I really want to get something up.

Also should have another ficlet for 'Talkin About' coming soon. As always, please read and review so I know your thoughts.

Disclaimer: Not mine!

Here and Now: Chapter Four

Two and a half hours with traffic getting home. Two hours of silence in the SUV while Chuck held his gloved hand to her forehead, brow furrowed, both their breathe hitching on occasion. He came out of it a few times at the beginning, opening his eyes and taking deep breathes. She screamed once. Scott and I edgily remained quiet, only on occasion speaking low on our confusion or thoughts. Mumbling really, while trying to remain casual and calm. As if the reason for my return to civilization wasn't leaving it herself in the back seat behind me.

That last half hour was us discussing with Charles, well - me half yelling, about whatever the hell he was doing and how it was going to take 'much longer than anticipated' and where should we keep her. Like she was some lost thing or an abandoned puppy that we found.

The med bay seclusion room I vetoed- the kid's not a lab-rat. Her room with me staying guard they vetoed, with the safety of the students being a prime concern. The guest house might have been an option, but she's too volatile. Losing track of her with what she has going on could be too easy. The brig in the basement facility won out in the end, my initial pushback being squashed when no other alternatives could really be found.

She slept for the first few hours thanks to a sedative as Chuck took time to rest in hopes that he could prepare better to go into her psyche. Jean was to keep tabs but at all cost was instructed to not enter her mind seeing as the Phoenix had just made that appearance so recently. Me, I didn't know what to do. I don't know what to do.

Everything has a season, I of all people know this. I have learned through two different lifetimes, where I've had dozens of lifetimes, that nothing lasts forever. I am a man constantly fighting with time, and loss, and life to not become an animal- to continue to survive. I'm tired, I'm so fucking tired of seeing the people I've learned to love and live for fade away. Wars, Apocalyptic events, hell- old age. I have to imagine this is why I went on the run to begin with before Marie found me. Maybe I was right, maybe that is the best thing for me- just constantly moving so I don't have to do this side of things. I got this back, I **just** got this back. I just got _her_ back.

After pacing outside the observation wall for half an hour after Scott and Chuck left, I ended up taking that time to check in with Storm and Jeanie and fill them in. They already knew of course, and I can't even tell ya what we talked about but I need to feel useful, I need to do something. I'm good at hitting things, and hunting things- but there's nothing here that I can do. I can't fix this.

After hopping in the shower I return back down to bunker down along with her.

I went through two cigars, started to whittle out a new figure with a claw as I sat, and found myself drifting in thought. I sat on that padded bench facing her cell three hours before the screaming started and Jean was off to get Charles.

So much screaming, so many scents going through the basement filtration, all Marie but with something off. She was a caged animal, Marie looking like Marie but sounding anything but. Time passes while waiting for the Professor to finish meditating.

I keep whittling at the figurine in my hand, not wanting to let on that she's getting to me. Not wanting to make eye contact, but the whole time feeling pieces of me breaking as I listen and monitor her. I can't keep straight who's who as whoever or whatever they are take over her. As she morphs into different tones and inflections, different stances all right before my eyes as she thrashes around her cell. Sometimes pacing, sometimes lashing out, sometimes falling to the floor.

"-You'll never see her again you dog." She bellows, the metal bed and small sink around her vibrating.

"-Let me out please, I just want to go home and say goodbye to the people she never let me have a chance to say goodbye to." She says quietly, simply.

"-Did you know she fucked them? When she was off finding herself. This little whore wouldn't let me touch her when I was nice enough to pull over to pick her up, but she had no problem being with them, did she?"

"Oh this poor girl. This poor poor girl- I know she didn't mean to..."

"-Logan, Logan- please let me out...please? I'm okay, I'm back. Logan?" Doesn't smell like her still. "LET ME OUT YOU FUCKER."

"She's killed people, you know that right?"

"Hey Bub." This one got a glance up from me, her body hunched over just a little, her voice gruff. My eyes shoot up to meet hers.

"We'll get her back, alright?" This one shakes me some.

Finally, _finally_ after what feels like forever, the professor rolls in with Jean.

"Hush child." He says calmly as he enters the hall, and instantly the Rogue slumps over and starts to fall. Within seconds Jean has caught her with a hand raised in the air and lowers her to the bed.

"This is going to take time and focus Logan, and I fear a lot of hope." He says softly. With a deep breathe Charles enters the cell before the shield is put back up, and places his gloved hands once again on her temples. Jean gives my shoulder a squeeze before sitting next to me, her presence offering me solidarity and support. Marie isn't completely just mine after all.

Time passes, the mansion quiets above us as children and X-men sleep. The occasional shuffle happens in the kitchen as someone opens the fridge for a snack. Someone is watching old I Love Lucy episodes in the den. Jean is brought coffee at some point by Scott, and I'm offered a beer in a surprising gesture. We trail off after discussing their progress; There's not a whole lot to report.

It's just like the car- both being silent minus the few sounds escaping their lips while I sit and wait. I try to rest, to go into the light sleep where I can relax my body but still stay alert as Scott and Jean talk quietly next to me. It doesn't work, and I find myself pacing instead as I check monitors that I know Hank is monitoring from the lab.

I consider going up to visit with him when the Professor wakes loudly with a groan, slumping backwards in his chair. Within seconds Jean lowers the shield to help Charles as he holds his head, leaning down to ask if he's alright. I follow to her bed side.

"Yes. Yes." He reassures as I lean down to look at Marie. I perk as her scent reaches me, and then glance up hopefully at him. She smells like Marie. Honey and apple and whatever the hell cinnamon lotion she uses.

"No. It's not over." He starts, answering my question that was unasked. "For now, she's here Logan- but the fight's not won."

We follow him as he guides his chair out of the open area and the shield returns. I can't help as my nostrils flare and growl escapes lowly.

"It's for as much her protection as ours Logan. I can't guarantee or predict when she comes and goes, and if I don't rest I won't be able to continue to guide her back to us. So many imprints in her mind, it's a different world..." He tapers off lost in thought. After a few moments he shakes his head some.

"Scott, Jean- please accompany me to my room." he says wheeling by me while giving a knowing look. I listen to the sounds of clanging of footsteps on metal until they fade, the elevator closing. I rub at my face and sigh, not sure what to do now. Waiting, more waiting. I'm going to go crazy.

I jerk my head alert as I hear coughing coming from the cell, of loud gasps coming right where we had just left. I watch in amazement as she pulls herself up into a sitting position, holding her head as she continues to sputter and take deep breathes. I stand there gaping as I watch her attempt to calm down. For minutes, I don't move a muscle- scared that I'll pull her out of whatever concentration she's working with. I watch as she looks around, takes a drink from the water bottle to the left of the bed. Putting it down, she makes eye contact with me.

"Hey Raggedy man." She whispers and almost groans out as she continues to sit on the bed facing towards me, the hum of the force field thrumming steadily. She's covered in sweat and is noticeably shaking as she grips tightly onto the cot.

"Hey Darlin'" I respond back quietly, walking over to the bench and pull at my jeans as I sit down to face her.

"What's going on in there kid?"

She laughs for a few seconds, but then it morphs into a half cry, half wail as she bites her lip.

"Wish I could tell ya Sugar. I can't...I cant shut them up, no matter how we try to cut them off, I can't shut them up; I can't stop it." She takes a deep breathe while running a hand through her wild hair.

"I mean, you've seen them. They're mad, or bitter, or angry. Some are just sad and trying to keep out of the way or help. Everyone wants a chance to take over and say something, to see someone. It's like clawing my way through a crowd or mob. I'm constantly treading water while being pulled down. Even you can't keep them back, Mon Dieu." She sighs deeply before whispering, more for herself I think.

"I knew that things were going wrong, I fucking knew it- but I was too nervous and too stupid to acknowledge it. Fuck- and I already know exactly what you're gonna say Logan but I didn't call for help because damn it if I didn't want to need help. But then the coffee shop happened and I couldn't keep them all quiet and then I was just trapped- inside myself and I couldn't control ANYTHING."

"...I didn't think that the cure would lead to this...I just wanted to be able to touch.

Why am I not allowed to touch?"

I watch her and silently wait for her to finish before quietly growling in acknowledgement.

"I'm tired Logan. I'm fucked up, and I'm so tired."

I swallow as I watch the silent tears go down her face. God, she's not the only one. Maybe this is why we always gravitate towards each other no matter when, no matter where. We're broken. Two people who have gone through the motions, that are constantly seeking out that next moment to feel awake, to feel alive.

Looking at her I see myself, or rather someone I have been, someone I could be. That look of giving up, of a flighty animal backed into a corner. But that's not _us_ \- together. That's not what _we_ do. Here or there, we've always had each other. Now or then, we always kept going, we always did what we had to do, what we always thought was right. It doesn't matter where or when or what we are, cured, not cured, forgotten ourselves, found our past we figured it out together.

I lean forward onto my elbows while looking at her and clear my throat; It doesn't prevent my voice from cracking some. She looks weary at me, waiting for a lecture that will never come.

"You're still you Marie." I say looking at her, not sure who I'm trying to convince. The statement sits between us, hanging in the air as I watch her face change from surprise, to awe, to shame. "You're still you."

"Maybe, but for how long?" She says, crumpling down onto the floor, her body shaking with silent sobs she won't allow to reach anyone's ears. This isn't how it's supposed to be, why does the story always lead to misery?

I walk over to the invisible wall that keeps us apart and crouch down onto one knee so I'm in front of her.

"Hey. Kid. Kid!" I say a bit more forcefully. She darts her head up so we're eye level.

"You giving up fighting Darlin'? Just like that?" Her eyes dart back and forth over my face, trying to discern what to take from the question. "Would you let me give up Marie?"

She let's out a sob while curling her knees to her chest. With her eyes blood shot she looks at me with questioning and part disbelief while wiping at her nose with her sleeve.

"We ain't done Darlin'. You're still you." I say quietly. She looks at me for another minute before hugging her knees tighter and nodding silently- hiccuping now as her tears subside.

"Now, who ya got in there with ya?"

—

Yeahhhhh, I figure this is a good place to stop it! Remember to review!


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello hello True Believers! Here's another Chapter for you, this one definitely being a slow burn to get us to where we're going. This series has been overlapping with my SnapShot Drabble series and I think I plan on doing a chapter there on what happens on Rogue's side of the end of the Chapter.**

 **Ultimately there's going to be more action later on to help push our characters in the right direction, but for now I just wanted to allow some character building and tap into the idea of life events actually ending up being rather anticlimactic. You'll see.**

 **As always, read and review- stuck with me, I have some fun things coming down the pike!**

Disclaimer: Just the things I put them through is mine- the rest is Stan's.

Chapter Five

She starts telling me stories, some she's said in passing but most are ones I've never heard before. She tells me about the various people she met on the road who tried to take advantage of her. Of the three truck drivers, and two bartenders. How sometimes it was survival, or how she used her power as a last ditch effort. At times, it was purely just an accident.

She talks to me how she used her power one time when she danced with a guy in a moment of letting her guard down, thinking she was covered head to toe. He slipped his hand under her shirt on her stomach and then fell on top of her as the bar patrons looked on as she struggled to lift him off. He ended up being the Australian we met in the elevator- Slipstream was the name.

She's interrupted from time to time, usually by the person who she is talkin' about. Sometimes threats are said, sometimes with someone piping up to add to the story she's telling. She shimmers with sweat as she tries to keep control- be at the front she says.

"It's like a long hallway, least that's how I've always imagined it. And I try to lock people up behind doors- but they're all out and they're all trying to head to the exit and do whatever it is they wanna do."

I sit with my knees crossed, almost in meditative stance as I face her as she goes through her confessional directly across from me, behind the cell shield. Just listening, and then later on just watching as she taps in and out of conversation, as her eyes gloss over and her scent changes back and forth. At times she even passes out in sleep for micro naps. She'll wake with a start, tears, and sweat and panic in the air, and I'll

softly calm and encourage- tell her I'm here with her as she purges her demons.

"I'm here kid, I'm still here with ya Darlin'. You got someone behind you." I say after giving her a couple minutes from a particularly bad panic attack that she woke up with.

She gulps at air and shifts back, putting her back against the bed as she sprawls her legs out in front of her, rubbing at her face and arms.

"Some aren't so bad, " she says after another minute, almost desperately as she tries to shift focus.

"Some're welcome to be honest. I have my own little team in the back of the room, fighting through and trying to keep them back. It's like a never ending bar brawl. Sometimes it's easier to just try to hold everyone else off while I let one of the trusted psyches take over, ya know, like Lilah."

Sometimes she'll have the occasional burst of power that comes through. Her lips freezing over as the temperature spikes low in the room, our breathe showing. The metal buzzes around the room or how at times there's a slight hum as energy shifts in the room, whether because her fingers start crackling with sparks or a flicker of warped air around her. I even see her scratch at her knuckles at one point.

"Darlin'?" I say after she's silent for a longer period. We're four hours into her confessional and while she's having longer spurts of control, it's been a fight that I can do nothing but observe. Somewhere down the line an unspoken understanding has taken place where working through her passengers and letting them say their pieces seems to be more productive than fighting them.

"Still here." She says exhausted and quietly, small like. "They're calming some-teetering out. Letting the Rogue take over to get me through the worst of it." She trails off as The Professor wheels back in with 'Ro this time, beginning his session right where he left off. Force field down, hands against her forehead as she lays back on the bed. Nothing but time to watch and burn as they work.

I don't bother moving or acknowledging as I continue to sit outside the force field as I mull over her words. I can feel Storm 's gaze on me before she walks out, presumably to join the Beast upstairs.

'Letting the Rogue take over' she said; I know this feeling well. Not just because of my power or because I'm feral, but because I'm a man who experienced more than a man should experience. Pain, and loss. Of taking life from others, again and again and again. Hundreds? Thousands? Does it count from over there at the other time? I've felt my own life slipping away countless times, only for a lone thread to pull me back to the land of the living .

I'm animal and instinct because I need to survive. Not just literally, though of course the paths I always end up on do need my powers to let me get to the end of that chapter. But no- to survive I needed to cope- to drink water and drive on.

That's when Wolverine fully takes over- locks me down and gets me through what it must. I've seen the dirty and wrong and ugly in this world. I break things, tarnish them. I'll watch this world burn.

It's in these thoughts I realize just how important she and I are to each other, the understanding we have for what we have to do and have done. This is the moment I realize the respect we have for each other, for what and who we are. I've seen so much bad, but God- this woman has brought me back to living. To seeing that not all the bad doesn't come without the good. That sometimes the hurt is worth it. Without her I wouldn't have gotten the people or foundation to root to- a future to help form. She started it all.

I stretch my legs once to get basic needs out of the way and then I'm back to my bench, waiting.

Five

More

Hours.

Visitors come and go. Scott again, Yellow. Bobby at one point- But he leaves when given no responses. It's just hour after hour of watching. Pacing, meditating, pulling at my hair. Waiting.

Then just like that, it's over. No climatic ending, no white knighting to save the day. It makes it that much real and relieving, because that's what life is- moments that just happen that later might mark something important. We are moments in time that never see the relevance of a particular minute until it's over. Then all you know is the time before that moment, and then the time after it and how completely different they are.

They come out of it together and much calmer this go around then any time before. I walk towards them and hit the button on the shield as I get a scent that is all Marie. Honey and lily, sweat and salted dried tears- her exhaustion is palatable on my tongue. I focus in on her heartbeat as it thrums slow and steady. I glance at Charles as I hear both Hank and Ororo start down the hall to meet him. He looks tired but offers me up a small smile and nod.

Leaning down in front of Marie, I move a lock of hair that sticks to her forehead from sweat.

"Hey they Darlin'"

She smiles softly, squeezing my gloved hand before leaning forward against me. She melts into me as her shoulders half relax, and half shake as waves of tremors caused by anxiety release. She whimpers softly as I wrap her in my arms.

"She needs rest Logan, but she's back with us, for good it seems." I hear the professor quietly update.

"She'll be okay, given time to heal wounds we cannot see. Why don't you take her upstairs?; Hank can check in on her later. Both of us need time to repair."

With a gentle 'c'mon kid' I lift her light frame and walk past Chuck, thanking him with a weight that I'm not even sure I could fully convey.

Another knowing smile as the two come to collect him as he responds quietly

"While it may not be the same caliber, you are not the only one for an affinity towards Rogue here you know."

I nod in response while tucking her a bit more under my chin before making my way above. Her clinging and silent the whole way up to her room, she is back asleep within moments of being tucked in and a promise from me that I'll be there when she wakes up.


End file.
